Playing Free When the Pressure Creeps In

I remember committing one of the worst travels of my life when I was about 32 years old.

Not a little slide of the pivot foot or one of those loose ball plays where bodies are rolling around on the floor. I mean a real travel. Three full steps right off the jump ball. The kind of mistake I probably had not made since I was a kid.

I had already been playing professional basketball for nine years at that point. It was not a championship game or some huge moment. I was simply so hyped up to play that everything sped up in my head and I rushed the first thing I touched.

That memory comes back to me sometimes late in youth seasons. The games start carrying more weight, tournaments are coming, and kids can feel it around the gym even when no one is saying much out loud. Wanting something badly can tighten everything up.

I saw something similar once with a professional team I was coaching. We were playing the most popular team in the country and our guys were struggling early. They were working hard, but everything looked tight. Shots were short, passes were rushed, and decisions were coming a little late.

Before we went into the locker room at halftime to talk to the team, one of my assistant coaches said, “Coach, remember how when you were still playing, there’d be games where you wanted it so bad that you were so tight? And you were just making bad decisions and playing poorly? I think that’s what’s happening here.”

So before the second half we tried something a little different. We asked the players to close their eyes for a moment and think about some of the most fun they had ever had playing basketball. Not big wins or championships, just the simple moments that reminded them why they loved playing.

We reminded them they were already playing hard. Then we told them to go back out and just play. The second half looked like a completely different team. The ball moved, shots started falling, and the group looked like themselves again. They ended up winning that game. What stayed with me was how easily players can tighten up when they want something badly.

I think about that conversation sometimes when I hear parents say their child is not playing hard enough. Often times that is true because younger players are still learning what real effort looks like. At other times a kid may actually be trying very hard and the result looks tense instead of free.

When that happens the mistakes pile up and adults start wondering why their kid is not playing harder. In reality the game may simply be moving too fast in the player’s head because they care about the outcome.

Kids need to learn to compete and to play hard, especially late in a season. At the same time, playing hard and playing tense are not the same thing. A young player who remembers why they enjoy the game often looks very different from one who feels the entire game sitting on their shoulders.

The games matter. Kids still play best when the game feels like a game.